Not what you want to come home to

I always seem to get more contemplative around Christmas time. I remember many nights sitting alone in the living room of this or my mother’s house, looking at the lighted Christmas tree and just thinking.  Some years there was a tremendous sense of relief at having survived another semester of teaching and marking even though I usually had a brief case full of assignments to mark over the holidays.  Nowadays that reality seems very far away except in my dreams where I’m called upon to put in report card marks and I haven’t marked a single assignment.

More recently I look back over the time since the last Christmas tree stood alight in front of the living room window and think of the changes that have happened. This will be our first Christmas without Richard’s dad. This year I’m making an effort to see people who are important to me and whom I don’t often see in the daily goings-on. We have had dinner with neighbours at our house and dinner with two sets of long-standing friends at their houses. I have had my regular bi-weekly lunch with a one good friend and tea with another at her house. Tonight we took pizza to a friend who is in new digs, turned off the lights and watched from his window as plane after plane came into our field of vision before disappearing from view as they landed. Monday I will have coffee with someone I haven’t seen for months.

Spending time with friends feels good, and these gifts of time and attention given to me heighten my appreciation of this Christmas season. To quote Joseph Campbell, “When I retired from teaching, I knew that I had to create a new way of life, and I changed my manner of thinking about my life, just in terms of that notion — moving out of the sphere of achievement into the sphere of enjoyment and appreciation and relaxing to the wonder of it all.” I think that’s a wise way to look at things.

Emergency vehicle's lights

 Last night we were out at a movie, something we rarely do. When we came home there were four fire engines, two fire investigative units, one ladder truck and two police SUV’s on our street. One fire engine was parked directly in front of our house lights ablaze.  Since the street wasn’t blocked off, we drove down it to see if we could determine what was happening.  We quickly saw that our house was fine. From our living room,  I kept an eye on the street and was  thankful for the fire fighters and police officers who were quietly and competently going about their jobs.

 There is very little information in the media. Firefighters were called by neighbours who spotted the fire. The fire was in the back of the house. One individual was found in the house, was transported to hospital and died of ‘fire-related injuries.’ Firefighters continued to fight the fire from outside of the house when the main floor collapsed. Police and firefighters remained over night to control any hot spots and make sure the fire didn’t spread.


This morning when I got up all fire and police vehicles were gone and today our street seemed back to normal. For the family and friends of the person who lived in the house that burned, there will be no normal for a very long time. The movie we saw last night was A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood. The movie and the fire: two reminders, one gentle and one not so gentle of the importance of cultivating our kinder natures, of appreciating the moments that make up our lives, and of the importance of doing what we can to encourage kindness and gentleness in the world. Wishing you peace.

Moon rise on flight path